


Excessive realism ficlet

by calime



Category: Highlander: The Series
Genre: Gen, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2005-10-06
Updated: 2005-10-06
Packaged: 2017-10-12 09:36:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 369
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/123474
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/calime/pseuds/calime
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Warning: little itchy vermin inside.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Excessive realism ficlet

**Author's Note:**

>   
>  I was reading the fanfic cliche discussion in [](http://pat-t.livejournal.com/profile)[**pat_t**](http://pat-t.livejournal.com/)'s journal and got ...well, you could say *inspired* by [](http://cyberducks.livejournal.com/profile)[**cyberducks**](http://cyberducks.livejournal.com/) hilarious comment about ...ermm...lice.  
>  Disclaimer:Don't own anything. Don't know nothing. This is all [](http://cyberducks.livejournal.com/profile)[**cyberducks**](http://cyberducks.livejournal.com/) fault. Totally.  
> 

"Lice. Really fascinating little creatures," mused Methos.

"Taste quite good, too, especially when you're hungry enough. I could never fathom why some people considered them a delicacy, though. If you look at it this way, actually there is some nice symmetry visible here - they feed on you, you eat them - the eternal circle of life - oh, come on, Mac, don't look like that. Surely you have had lice before!"

"Not for the last century at least I have not!" growled Duncan.

"Would you for god's sake stop reminiscing about lice and come help me get that damn smelly goo worked in my hair? I want to get rid of them, not listen to the lecture on their culinary merits - and anyway, it is all your fault that I got the nasty things!"

"My fault? How was I supposed to know that you would manage to get lice???"

"For starters, getting ourselves arrested was your idea. And I recall that I did not get to vote on the matter before we were actually crammed into the cell with about ten of those punks - what were they protesting against, anyway?"

"Well, you have to admit that it got us away from the Hunters and contrary to your twisted preconception of me I do not have a hundred contingency plans up my sleeve at any given moment! I was just improvising! And how was I supposed to know that you'd get lice from our cell mates? Perhaps you should keep your hair shorter; it seems to attract unwelcome visitors..."

"Yes, like you, for example."

Duncan sniffed the medicinal shampoo cautiously and made a face.

"And now you can improvise the little vermin off me! I hope this stuff works; it certainly smells horrible enough for every living thing to drop dead at the first whiff."

Methos grinned evilly.

"Well, I'm sure that you remember the most effective de-lousing method from the days of your youth..."

"Methos. If you so much as think of *cutting my hair* or *shaving*...or anything with the similar connotations, I'll de-louse you! With a dull knife and lye soap!"

"Ok, ok, no need to get angry. Though," Methos snickered, "I bet you'd look really intresting when bald!"


End file.
